When my girlfriend’s student visa ran out and she asked me to fill in the marriage licence forms so that she can stay her - I realised I have underpants older than her

In fact I’d already been married once when she was born ha ha.



Still fashions change don’t they? Cambodia wasn’t on the map in those days it was Thailand and Russia!

When at the match and I heard somebody say "yes. over there, just behind the old bloke". So, I looked around to see where this old bloke was...and it then dawned on me! I was the old bloke.

When you remember 2 divorces with both citing "he couldn't keep it in his trousers" and the current wife moaning all I do "is keep it in my trousers".



Mind you' you know the wife's getting old when you catch a verrucae from a tit .

"Signs you are getting old" appears to have become a Bernard Manning set-list.

When you remember any set list by Bernard Manning

Shurrup you Pinko ponce.

You know you’re past it if you still think brexit’s a good idea.

Seeing a pair of roller skates in a museum, only to realise you had a pair as a kid.



They were hand-me-downs but...



Cracking skates though.

Excellent riposte young sir

Why thank you old boy

I remember those skates well







(hope the pic works)